VT Bash

#83 Up ↑ 25/29 Down ↓ 2012-09-12 11:54

// Mohammed, an Iranian, walks up to an NSA recruiter at an info session after grabbing a bunch of food
Mohammed: I'm not a US citizen!
NSA recruiter: I always expect that joke at these things
Mohammed: No, I'm seriously not
NSA recruiter: ...
Mohammed: I was just wondering if there was any way to get around that restriction
NSA recruiter: ...
Calvin: Tell him about your other citizenships!
NSA recruiter: Uh, no... US citizenship is actually a requirement for all government jobs...

#917 Up ↑ 25/25 Down ↓ 2018-06-01 12:21

h4des: why work when you can shitpost in irc

#922 Up ↑ 25/25 Down ↓ 2018-07-18 19:45

+h4des | are we allowed to eat beans in the ECE server room
+h4des | asking for a friend
  +gig | what the fuck

#63 Up ↑ 24/24 Down ↓ 2012-05-26 20:46

<wallmani> guys, never fuck swedish women
<guzzles> that's basic opsec

#171 Up ↑ 24/26 Down ↓ 2013-01-13 19:37

mohammed | Guess who the Systems TA is
    +aam | if it's mohammed I lost all hopes in CS@VT
mohammed | Me too. 
mohammed | Im not sure why they gave me Systems of all classes

#17 Up ↑ 23/23 Down ↓ 2012-01-05 19:41

<ackthet> that sucks mexican athiest transsexual republican dick
<cco3> why do I ever flip to this screen?

#6 Up ↑ 22/26 Down ↓ 2011-12-29 20:23

<+ackthet> hackedhead: grep your logs for blist
<+ackthet> you should
< xunil> grep the internet for porn
< xunil> you should

#35 Up ↑ 22/30 Down ↓ 2012-03-08 12:02

ackthet | the best thing that ever fucking happenend to me              
ackthet | was i was driving to jlab                                     
ackthet | at night                                                      
ackthet | blasting Storm                                                
ackthet | while this rediculous eletrical storm when apeshit in the distance                                                          
ackthet | i came so hard i lost velocity due to conservation of momentum

#149 Up ↑ 22/28 Down ↓ 2012-11-24 17:16

      wallmani | truncatedcone: mutantmonkey <will> script his wife to do what he needs her to do 
+truncatedcone | Okay, wallmani.
      wallmani | you know it's true, stop denying it
 +mutantmonkey | why have a wife when you can just write a program to do the job of one?
     dyreshark | mutantmonkey: i feel like when you move into your own home, you'll just build a robot and attach a fleshlight to it
     dyreshark | and call it your wife
          +ram | aaaand that image is out there for all the #vtluug-ing world to think about 
          +ram | thank you dyreshark

#176 Up ↑ 22/24 Down ↓ 2013-01-28 17:41

Mohammed: Sara, how would you rate my interactions with you as a woman on a scale from 1-10 based on awkwardness?

#920 Up ↑ 22/22 Down ↓ 2018-07-07 12:21

h4des | Programación Orientada a Objectos
h4des | POO
h4des | i now know why pew hates object oriented langs
 @pew | it's just like pew
 @pew | when you spell it backwards, it's terrible

#183 Up ↑ 21/23 Down ↓ 2013-01-30 22:49

Ben G: If I can keep my shit together, my 30th birthday present to myself will be a Tesla Model S. I'm planning on paying with a briefcase full of hundreds, handcuffed to myself.
Andrei: That won't work; I've tried it before. The dealership wouldn't accept my cash.

#911 Up ↑ 21/21 Down ↓ 2018-02-21 23:14

<truncatedcone> ・̛̀͏̢゜̨͟͠゜̸͟・̵̴̧̛̀。̨̛͜͞。͢͏̶̧̢ ̢͞͏͜͠ ҉̨́͢͏・̷̶̀͢͝゜̀͡゜̸̢͜\҉̧͜_҉̷̶́͠ó̸̴̡̀͟<̴͢ ̶̨̕Q̵҉̧̨̛̕U҉͘A̡̧̛͠C͘͠Ḱ̷̴͡!͡
<+pew> what the FUCK
<salamander> It's like earrape but for IRC
<salamander> I love it

#80 Up ↑ 20/22 Down ↓ 2012-09-06 10:02

<dyreshark>    telnoratti: is he complaining about how Notepad doesn't sanely handle any line ending but crlf?
<dyreshark>    :p
<telnoratti>   =P
<telnoratti>   how did you know?
<microcosmus>  haha
<telnoratti>   is serious
<dyreshark>    seriously?
<skrblr>       ...yes
<microcosmus>  ...
<microcosmus>  hahaha
<telnoratti>   wait you didn't know that's what he was complaining about?
<dyreshark>    fucking wins all the internets
<dyreshark>    no
<dyreshark>    i pulled it out of my ass. seriously.
<skrblr>       he was literally on about that about 10 minutes ago

#106 Up ↑ 20/20 Down ↓ 2012-10-08 00:33

andreim | sometimes coeus quotes pop into my head and I laugh by myself
andreim | like telno-fucking-ratti
andreim | it has so much humor embedded
andreim | the fact that he's coeus
andreim | the way he said it
andreim | the context
andreim | it's very good

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